One of the great things about childhood is the world of make-believe. Us boys would “play army,” and it seemed entirely real. With a stick-gun and an imagination, battles would rage, paratroopers would descend, and every bullet would hit its mark. Sadly, as we grow older, our ability to “suspend disbelief” fades – and eventually the imaginary world mostly vanishes. The smell of perfume, gunpowder, and gasoline draws us into a new kind of reality … and once we reach adulthood and start paying taxes, reality gives us a knuckle-sandwich.
For some unknown reason, people in the cult of the Left have returned to a sort of Pax Imaginationa, where pretending things are real makes them real. And unlike childhood, the pretend world doesn’t end for them when the streetlights come on, and they return home for dinner. They’re carrying those delusions into the house, and having discussions at the table about how stupid reality-based grown-ups are.
It’s outrageous to them that the rest of us can no longer hear the roar of imaginary artillery fire, the crackle of radio transmissions and the whistle of incoming mortar rounds.
Let’s take a look at some of the issues requiring mental divergence:
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COVID-19
The Left continues to pretend the crimes of Covid-19 weren’t even misdemeanors … they believe those insanely stupid decisions to have been smart, and in our best interest: Lockdowns, social distancing, canceling of church services while green-lighting riots … in their eyes, these were logical and scientifically-sound decisions.
Then, of course, there’s hydroxychloroquine … which worked, but doctors were told they’d lose their board certification if they prescribed it. Yet another hydroxychloroquine study has emerged, this time from Belgium, that shows it is an excellent option. There is literally world-wide circumstantial evidence hydroxychloroquine worked … and lockdowns did not. For those of you who watch too many courtroom dramas, allow me to explain: If you put a cat and mouse in a box, and the next day the mouse is gone, there is but circumstantial evidence that the cat ate the mouse.
Then there’s the vaccines, which worked for a few weeks at best, and some not at all. The President himself recently said, “I signed off this morning on a proposal we have to present to the Congress a request for additional funding for a new vaccine that is necessary, that works.” Here one can make only two choices: That Biden stated the previous vaccine didn’t work, or he is so demented he can no longer control his words.
Reuters News reported this October 23rd that only 7 million Americans have taken the new vaccine … the one endorsed by Biden. Yes, just 7 million. Is the pro-vaccine crowd admitting the first ones didn’t work, so they don’t want the new one? Is the fact that young healthy athletes are dropping dead on playing fields spooking them? Are they pretending the governments orders to get the first shot were smart and based on good science, but the new orders are not? Do they think that the federal government made a good decision to fire unvaccinated workers, and another good decision to end the mandate?
How do you explain the fact that only 2.3 percent of Americans are agreeing to the new jab? For you, who live in a real world, the answer is obvious. If you want to know how the pretend world people explain it away, by all means keep scrolling down at the end of this article … my merry band of vapid, effete, shrieking trolls will be typing their answers with fury.
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JOE BIDEN
Our brothers and sisters living in the pretend world love to imagine Joe Biden as a mentally-competent, vigorous man, fit to lead the Free World. The truth? He is a victim of elder abuse, and a walking poster-man of Alzheimer’s disease.
It is fine, of course, to say, “I don’t care that he doesn’t know what day it is … that he can’t take unscripted questions … that his public appearances are embarrassing … that he states during pressers he isn’t “allowed” to go off script … that the freakin’ Easter Bunny dragging him away from the press was too sad to even believe … but I don’t care. I like the policy decisions being made by the functioning adults after his 8:00 p.m. bedtime.”
That is a logical stance.
But if you live in Fantasyland, you can’t bring yourself to say Biden is demented. You can’t bring yourself to even think it. You have to think this doddering old fool — who’d only qualify for assisted living in a reputable retirement community — is in charge. You have to think a 60 Minutes reporter finishing his sentences for him is normal, and ending a speech that has nothing to do with England with “God Save the Queen” isn’t pathetic.
I’d be thrilled to hear an argument for his competence — hell, an argument that he’s not a global embarrassment—without a comparison to Trump. I don’t think it can be done, but if it can, one of my bedwetting, Cry-Pod trolls will do so below.
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RENEWABLE ENERGY DEBACLE
Believing America’s policies regarding “renewable energy” are wise and prudent requires a level of pretend on par with believing our Southern Border is under control.
Please note … I’m not talking about man-made global warming … let’s pretend that’s true, Gretta Whatshername is an expert, and the world is going to end … what was it? Four years ago?
Isn’t the rush to adopt electric vehicles moronic, given that virtually every one of them is powered by coal or natural gas? And why do we ignore the Second Law of Thermodynamics when it comes to powering those electric vehicles with coal and natural gas? (That’s as science-ee as it gets).
Why isn’t natural gas considered clean?
What are we doing with retired turbine blades?
Do off-shore turbines’ impact on whales not matter?
Is it not troublesome that the Secretary of Energy needed to send the Secret Service ahead of her to “save her a place” at charging stations when driving from Charlotte to Memphis? Sure, zealots might argue America needs to build more charging stations, but shouldn’t that have been done before tens of billions of our tax dollars were dumped into EV and renewable energy subsidies?
Why are automakers making electric pickup trucks — an offering to their actual demographics on par with Bud Light’s brilliance? Could it be due to government pressure and subsidies?
What would’ve happened to the EV drivers in Virginia’s 20-hour traffic jam caused by a snowstorm? What if they’d all been in EVs?
What of the claims by physicists and chemists that batteries are reaching the point where physics will not allow them to hold more juice? If they are right or wrong, shouldn’t we have figured that out before the EV craze? Will we have trucks to haul EVs through areas like Death Valley?
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The list of renewable energy questions is ponderous, especially since none of these questions is critical of renewable energy, but simply beg the question, “Why are we rebuilding our economy on a technology that hasn’t yet begun to reach maturation?” Perhaps I’m forgetting, but I do not recall the Wright Brothers working on rocket ships after their successful flight presentation in Paris.
But worry not, Gentle Reader, the answers you seek will be provided in the comments below, offered by my brain-trust of femboys.
It’s incredible how many pretend scenarios the Left must swallow just to drink their morning coffee: Israel doesn’t want peace/ refuses to negotiate about a Palestinian state — a fact refuted by St. Bill Clinton himself. Mobs looting stores out of existence in broad daylight isn’t a problem — it’s reparations, or how they’re “feeding their families.”
The squalor that is LA’s homeless camps isn’t due to leftist policies. Men can get pregnant. Printing money doesn’t cause inflation. Demands that we pay back the national debt will never come. Hunter Biden did not conspire with his father to extort money from America’s enemies. The DOJ and the FBI did not conspire to stop President Trump winning, or attempt to remove him from office.
If you too find these beliefs impossible to understand or explain … worry not, lovers of logic. Just scroll down and see the world-view of the denizens of the pretend world. They won’t actually respond to any of the issues I’ve raised, but their hilarity of their toddler-tantrum logic is priceless.
Now kick back and pour yourself a big drink. You’re gonna need it.
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR …
Prioleau Alexander is a freelance writer, focusing mostly on politics and non-fiction humor. He is the author of four books: ‘You Want Fries With That?,’ ‘Dispatches Along the Way,’ ‘Where Have All The Cowboys Gone?‘ and ‘They Don’t Call It The Submission Process For Nothing.’ Oh, and if you want to see his preferred bio pic? Click here …
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12 comments
I feel dumber just from reading that.
My EV is quiet and powerful and gets its charge from my solar panels which generate enough clean energy to send excess back to the Duke Energy grid. I’m not suggesting that EV’s are the answer for everyone but if you’ve ever driven one, then you might change your mind. It’s like going from the old massive mobile phones that sat under the driver seat to an iPhone. Besides some EV batteries will be made in SC and most are made here in the US.
Try one out! You might be surprised. Btw, I’ll be the first to get an electric truck when they do come out. I pull heavy loads and need the power.
Anonymous, you go get that electric truck and drive it on up here to northern Minnesota. We’ll see how long it lasts through the winter in snow, ice and frigid temps. You won’t be able to keep your windshield clear enough to drive safely. And your batteries can’t generate enough heat to keep you warm for long if stranded in a snowstorm. One month into winter with a hybrid EV (gas/electric) was enough for me to dump that vehicle and return to my Yukon XL.
Hmmm. I’m not sure that makes sense. I have a new Toyota Hybrid truck in addition to my Tesla EV (thank you Trump and the Republican Party for the tax breaks you gave the upper income taxpayers) and the Internal Combustion Engine works fine. The battery provides a boost of power so that the V 6 engine is able to tow a load as handily as my Chevy one ton diesel but with less and cheaper regular gas. Just sayin.
Question – how much was your EV, and how much will the battery replacement cost?
When I lived in Wisconsin, any sort of electronic device barely worked when it was -50 degrees. Glad you can afford an EV, but a good majority of the population can’t. The battery life is also pretty dismal and when they die, prepare to fork over five-figures for a new one.
Why does it matter that batteries will be made in South Carolina?
Prioleau Alexander is my new favorite author! Awesome description of the stunted growth of an entire generation and those that exploit their ignorance, gullibility and fear. Poor things need designated safe spaces so as not to get their feelings hurt.
Drunkle’s venture into lecturing whipper snappers about pretend worlds…
HCQ as a treatment for covid? Check.
Sleepy dementia patient Joe is incompetent even though he’s got a “crime family” and “stole” the election? Check.
Doesn’t understand science when it comes to climate change, but still claims AGW doesn’t exist? Check.
You don’t need 5G nanochips to figure out this guy lost a few too many brain cells.
By far, one of my favorite columns from Prioleau.
Great column Prioleau. You won’t find an argument here. In fact, I’m going back to read it again it was so good.
In short, Mr. Alexander refuses to acknowledge that millions died in the US due to the gross incompetence of the Trump administration and the unwillingness of the GQP to listen to “science”, something they surely do NOT believe in (and probably failed in school). The rest is the usual litany of “talking points” aka right-wingnut propaganda. Yawn. And more god-awful writing from Drunkle. No wonder his books don’t sell and he’s reduced to pimping himself out for Fits. What a way to make a living.
Spot on, as always, Mr. Alexander. Reality in this world today, even our country, is so refreshing. Don’t go changing.