WHY ARE YOUNG PEOPLE ABUSING ONE ANOTHER … AND CONSENTING TO ABUSE?
By LEN ANTHONY || A few weeks ago I wrote an article regarding out-of-control fraternities. Meanwhile an investigation into the suspicious death of a Clemson fraternity member is ongoing. More recently, we learned that hazing is not reserved for college fraternities – as senior members of a New Jersey high school football team stand accused of sexually assaulting junior members of the team.
This behavior begs two questions: First, why are young men so desirous to abuse other young men? Secondly, why do young men allow themselves to be abused? I have no answers. I hope some FITSNews readers do.
Regarding the first question, there have always been bullies. And I am fairly confident the cure is for someone to beat the crap out of them. (I suspect a psychiatrist would disagree with me but remember the episode of The Andy Griffith Show in which the bully was taking Opie’s lunch money? Sheriff Taylor told Opie to stand up for himself – and he did. I go with Sheriff Taylor).
The second question is more bizarre. I don’t think anyone enjoys being a victim. So, the fraternity pledges and the junior high school football players are for some reason so desperate to be a part of these organizations they will voluntarily endure abuse and humiliation.
A fraternity is nothing more than a social club a member pays to join – big deal. Being a member of a high school football team carries some testosterone based notoriety. But it is hard to present yourself as a tough guy when you just let another man shove his finger up your anus, and – if the allegations are true – then place that finger in your mouth. Plus, there isn’t much manliness in sticking your finger in some other man’s anus.
Of course, there isn’t much manliness in a fraternity pledge consenting to being abused and humiliated. So, I just don’t get it.
As usual I fall back to the wisdom of John Wayne. In his last movie, The Shootist, he said: “I won’t be wronged. I won’t be insulted. I won’t be laid a-hand on. I don’t do these things to other people, and I require the same from them.”
Seems like a good rule to live by, doesn’t it?
Len Anthony spent thirty years as in-house counsel for a public utility. He’s now semi-retired living in North Myrtle Beach, S.C. Wanna sound off on FITS? Submit your letter to the editor or opinion column HERE.
39 comments
You got half of it. Guys tolerate it because they are insecure and willing to endure it to be accepted. Then they convince themselves and each other that it was an honorable and manly experience and that anybody who refuses to endure it is an unworthy wuss. Lots of frat members, old and young, who read this will believe that is what you and I are for thinking as we do. They are really just stuck in adolescence if they believe that tolerating hazing is being a man.
Well said. In truth, a lot of people are terrified to be alone with themselves. I’ve known strong, seemingly tough guys who could barely manage staying alone in a hotel room overnight. They need people and the reassurance that comes from the group.
“I’ve known strong, seemingly tough guys who could barely manage staying alone in a hotel room overnight.” — yes, how very true…….
————————————————-
A traveler has checked into a hotel. Glancing at the Gideon Bible, he reads on the front page, “If you are sick at heart, read page 124. If you are unsure of your journey, read page 144. If you are very lonely, read page 188.”
Being very lonely, the man reads page 188. At the bottom of the page, scribbled in ink, he finds a message: “If this page hasn’t worked, call Phoebe at 555-8910.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rcu-cTBO6IU
Yep, I have worked with some of those guys. I never understood what it was that made them tick. They can annoy the hell out of their co-workers, though.
It is the desire of young Republicans to assert humiliating control over their peers. It prepares them for a life of date rape, theft, hypocrisy, and betrayal. The lessons they learn about human nature through hazing become a template for a life of emotionless materialism and positions of objective, ego-satisfying control.
That is more the herd mentality of the Dims. than the independent attitude of Republicans.
Rogue, the stuff that you say across this blog so obviously comes from the closed con-servative media information loop. And, it proves there is virtually no independent thought among con-servatives, just Frank Luntz focus group developed talking points.
Nothing personal…but, you are hardly one to speak of other people in herds.
Your comments seem to come from MSNBC. So if mine come from FNC, that is my business. BTW I look at all sides and form my own opinion. I just happen to think like what I consider to be an American. And I agree with you on the coach pulling the plug.
otal DayP2+ (000s)25-54 (000s)35-64 (000s)FOXN 1,199 245 475CNN 417 137 206MSNBC 343 65 140CNBC 168 48 63FBN 47 7 15HLN 223 98 127
Still just a drop in the bucket compared to the Mainstream news outlets..
“ABC broadcast drew 7.793 million vs. the 8,029,000 first reported, a drop of -2.9%. NBC drew 8.239 million vs. 8.187 million, a gain of +.6%. This is significant because during the following week, Sept. 29, ”
And when you consider that fox draws the hard core right and the others everyone else the gap is even smaller in comparison. And honestly does anyone consider Fox news ..news?
“does anyone consider Fox news ..news?”
Actually a good number of old white people still cling to that delusion.
Faux is a godsend to the ignorant – their lives of dissipation are rewarded with approval, and membership in an exclusive club where bullying hate is expressed with guns, drunkenness, and animal lust. It’s about time we rewarded people for knowing who to hate, who to harass and ridicule even if the reasons they hate them are petty exaggerations and out of context lies provided every night on the “news.”
Nothing coming from Faux ever fails the smell test for those who live in the sewer.
What really irritates old Bill is that Jon Stewart has had more viewers a night than he has since 2011. Even though they are in the same infotainment industry. It irritates him even more that even the less watched Colbert Report, crushes him in the coveted 18 to 34 age group. I think the market has spoken.
By the way it is not irritation to point out that Fox is not really a News Network, or that people who watch Fox are less informed that people who only get their news from Jon Stewart and Steven Colbert. Its just criticism.
It’s amusing that Democrats, rather than address arguments, hurl “FOX NEWS POINTS” at any comment made as if that’s a legitimate counter-argument. I guess in the echo chamber of democratic debate, this is a devastating point.
Faux news is, itself, an embarrassing waddle. Just the mention of it brings a grin to the face of clear thinkers, who see it for the brazen adherence to childish exaggeration and hyperbole that it is. Grown men and women, appearing on television to give their support for the simple, mean spirited razzing of shameless, selfish and brutish children, unable to rise above even the cootie.
It is Faux, the pretender to objectivity and a mature alternative, “fair and balanced,” that clearly outlines the immaturity and vanity of their audience – not mocking them, but instead, appealing to their most base nature.
Faux news is an open condemnation of Republicans, and their audacity at exposing them for what they are, is taken as proof that they are not.
Is the fool equal to the wise, if they are given equal consideration, and the fool acquires a powerful champion?
What is your point. I think it was the Colonel that brought up ratings. I was just pointing out the fallacy of his argument.
No that just shows what “sheeple” Fox’ers are
Remember you are listing cable/satellite listings.
Fuck a bunch of O’Reilly and his smug persona
i watch one show on MSNBC (“Morning Joe”) just to “dog” Mika Brezenski (looks,brains and class all rolled into one leggy MILF!!). if only joe woud shut the fuck up and letsomeone else do the talking. And Rachael Maddow would make a world class bartender and she exhibits a genuine sense of humor (what little i watch her) not like that smug assed O’Reilly – fuck him
I actually think “Imus In the Morning” on FBN is the best morning show but Imus comes across as a old SOB and I love Warner Wolf for “old school” sports reporting and that McDowell girl giving the business news and quips about her sex life.
In the old news reels, Hitler looked like a clown. I never understood how such a self-absorbed nincompoop became so idolized. Maybe it was the angry, uncompromising way he talked… maybe it was his hate for minorities. He was so *popular* – the thug on the street, the common drunk – hung on his every word – though they were the same ones, over.. and over.. and over…. I guess like here – it was beer and lack of education.
Most can agree that the country is in decline. For roughly 97% of our citizens, it has gotten progressively worse over the past 40 years. However, anyone who continues to stand atop their roof and shout that it’s one president or one party’s agenda is–as nicely as I can say–completely naive. These politicians (regardless to letter after name) are no more than figureheads.
The department of defense, the banking industry, and the energy sector are where the shots are called, and it’s there that the people of this country should be marching with pitchforks (as well as the politicians that enable and empower these sectors). Instead of listening to Fox or MSNBC for your source of info, just read a few books and do minimal research.
Anyone who thinks it’s “red” or “blue’s” fault is hopelessly ignorant. There are very, very few politicians that serve to better the common man.
Republicans?
That explains the Florida A&M band. The all African-American band is hot bed of Republican activism.
lol. Your trolling has been top notch lately.
trolling?
That’s just good old fashioned commentary.
The Republicans have disarmed sarcasm through extraordinary extremism, beyond mocking.
There’s nothing funny or compelling about a rabid monkey – his debilitating disease is at once the source of his insanity, and his weapon against being taken lightly.
I could shake off the uneasy feeling that a rabid monkey or two had escaped from the zoo… but seeing them sitting in the chairs of a major news network at prime time.. behind the powerful bureaucratic desk of federal employ… dressed in DEA uniforms.. at Chipoltle carrying guns!
My equanimity is sorely tested.
“A fraternity is nothing more than a social club a member pays to join – big deal. ”
Then you joined the wrong fraternity. I’m a frat boy who spent the weekend at our chapter’s 75th reunion. We’ve had about 1,000 members join since our inception in 1940, and about 150 of us attended the reunion. I personally had a great conversation with one of my frat brothers who graduated in 1968, learning about his life after college (teacher, US Army draftee who served in Viet Nam, joined a commune, started a candle-selling business which expanded to five states and they sold for seven figures, found religion, and is now a pastor). My fraternity experience has been filled with moments like that, and the worst thing we had to do during pledging was publicly address active members with “Good morning, Mr. (insert name), distinguished member of Delta Gamma Tau. (Yes, it sounds silly, but we later learned the purpose was to put names and faces together of brothers we may not have known). Yes, we got squirted with jets of water from fire extinguishers for missing a question on a fraternity history test, had to work off demerits earned for breaking rules by washing an actives’ car or cleaning their room, etc. This would all qualify today as “hazing” under the current administrative interpretation, by the way. Since graduating in 1983, my brothers were there for me when I got married, when my parents passed away, and helped me with my career. So maybe you should know that there is a difference between a true fraternity and the “social club” you joined…
Do you still wear croakies and pastel shirts with shorts?
LOL! Couldn’t afford those fancy duds- I was a sweats or jeans with a flannel shirt or athletic department t-shirt guy…a prof once told me I looked very GQ- Ghetto Quarterly…
Is that a pledge pin on you uniform?
Look no further than The Citadel for government backed, publicly funded hazing that no one gives a second thought about.
Not true, those of who recruit for colleges point out that bovine excreta every chance we get…
http://www.postandcourier.com/article/20110613/PC1602/306139924
Do you still believe that Earth is flat, too?
You’re missing his point- he’s saying that Citadel hazing IS given a second thought, in that other colleges use it to their own competitive advantage. In other words, explain to the kiddies that el Cid can look like a Lord of the Flies remake and they may choose their school instead. No flat Earthers here.
Lenny, I’m getting bullied by my powers company, like the mafia trash services of Manhattan, they’ve got a monopoly and now I’m paying about 17 powers bills per year of the 2009 am out I was paying 12 of – yet like most I don’t get any additional pay checks …? Where’s Opie or john wayne when you need them to help you buy back the legislature and over turn the based load review act and publicize the fact that that the nuclear generators are already a failure and will be years behind and this message as just a scam (SCAMA?) To squeeze more undeserved money out of the customers…and can we do it before the end of the episode or movie?
Hazing is a myth. Hazing is amazing.
Dude everyone knows it’s all about sex. You join a fraternity, you get unlimited Greek poon. End of story.
It worked out well for the dog in “Van Wilder”. For the frat boys who got the dog pastries, not so much.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYFM66TC4nI
Len Anthony=Geed
I saw hazing from both ends while a frat guy in college. I didn’t care much for it while receiving it at the time, but looking back on it through the haze of time, it was fun. There are, of course, different degrees of it, but any hard and fast rule that is intended to eliminate it is only going to be ignored, or make hazing even more popular than it is now {compare, for example, phohibition’s effect on drinking).
Now i don’t know a damn thing about someone siticking their finger up another guy’s ass (I do know a joke about it but that is for another time…..) Nor do i want to.
I wouldn’t want to be part of any club where some guy sticks his finger in my ass except as part of my annual physical (not including 20 years of flight physicals) which for some stupid reason I actually pay the Doc to do just that………………………………….
So maybe it’s not so sick after all??????
Anyhoo I kinda digress…………………..
i do know a thing or two about young males allowing themselves to be abused & humilated……….
It’s normally refererred to as military basic training!!!!!
Sure. Take your clothes off and go kneel down over there by that post – I’ll get the barbed wire, a 2×4 and a 750 ml. bottle of Everclear, and I’ll be right back!.
Hazing, like bullying, exists because it works. Hazing raises the real and perceived cost of joining a group, therefore increasing the perceived (and real) value of membership once admitted. In terms journalists can understand, it builds loyalty. It has been used successfully in the military since ancient times. Like everything, sometimes it is taken too far, and the law should be there to discourage those situations.