Attorney Issues Statement On Summerville Teen’s Suspension
Charleston, South Carolina – August 21, 2014 – Attorney David Aylor issued the following statemeYou must Subscribe or log in to read the rest of this content.
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TBG capped his neighbor’s unicorn in a moment of teenage exuberance.
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TBG was spearfishing in the Keys years ago and took a shot at a mermaid. Missed but the spear got stuck in a coral that was part pf a private marine sanctuary owned by a famous pop singer.
Yes.
I Shot the Cher Reef.
5+
We have sunk to new lows. But, it is kinda crafty.
A man was sitting in the bar when he noticed another patron a few stools away. The guy had a body like
Charles Atlas, but his head was the size of a thimble.
The first man said, “Please excuse me for staring, but I can’t help but be curious as to why your body is so well developed, but your head is so small?”
The man said, “Buy me a drink and I’ll tell you.”
The drink was ordered and the story began. “I was in the navy and my ship was sunk by a torpedo. I was the only survivor and I managed to make it to a deserted island a few miles away. I had been there alone for several months and was sitting on the beach one day waiting for a bird or fish to come by so I would have something to eat, looking up I saw a beautiful mermaid sunning on a nearby rock. She swam over to me and informed me that she was a magical mermaid and could grant me three wishes. ‘Great,’ I said. ‘I’d like to be rescued.'”
“She slapped the water with her tail and a ship appeared, sailing straight for my island. Next I asked for a body like Charles Atlas. Another slap of the tail and here it is. Then, noticing how beautiful she was and all my other wishes fulfilled I asked if I could make love to her. She said no that it just wouldn’t work her being half fish and all. So I said, ‘Well, how about a little head then?’
Reading the first line, I couldn’t help but wonder how this story might have turned out if it had begun with: “A man was sitting on a toilet when he noticed another a few stools away.”
So….uh…has anyone heard when the Reverends Osteen and Bell are going to show up to organize the protest? Look out HH Gregg! TBG’s gotsta have a new flatscreen for football season!
David Aylor is … a prosecutor for the City OF Hanahan.
Fixed it for you, David.
Wait until Barney’s lawyers get involved.
http://barney.wikia.com/wiki/Barney_Lawsuits
Here’s hoping Attorney Aylor not only gets the kids record cleaned and restored to its state of being before this atrocity, but he gets expensive judgments against every cop, teacher, principal, or other idiot involved in it.
There are probably several attorneys for the cops who are currently burying their heads in their hands and wishing it just weren’t so.. I vote we start circulating those nude photographs of the Summerville Chief.
Any chance you can print what the kid wrote?
“The parents are perplexed and disappointed by the actions of Summerville High School, Dorchester School District 2 officials and the Summerville Police Department over a creative writing assignment.”
I may be perplexed and disappointed too, but not surprised. School officials are almost typically morons. And cops are badged bureaucrats now.
Creative writing by the rest of the kids in that school district should now always include some reference to a “dinosaur shot with a gun.” Keep reminding the morons of their stupidity and knee-jerk reactions. A simple Q&A with the student should have been enough to satisfy the teacher and principal. Forget about the police. They should have seen it for what it was. But, hey, they will all smugly rest on their actions for having “saved” the school from disaster. Good for them. Now, about that PopTart that was bitten into the shape of a pistol . . .
I suppose it’s too late (by blog standards) to note that the student was not arrested for what he wrote, but for being disruptive of a school after becoming irate at school officials asking about what he wrote.
As usual, this matter will disappear from view before all the facts are established.