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High Heels: This Explains A Lot …

IT’S ALL IN THE GAIT … For those of you new to this website, our founding editor Will Folks (a.k.a. Sic Willie) has a serious obsession with women in high-heeled shoes.  In fact his addiction eclipses even the legendary shoe fetish of Dom “Woogie” Woganowski from 1998’s Farrelly brothers’ comedy…

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IT’S ALL IN THE GAIT …

For those of you new to this website, our founding editor Will Folks (a.k.a. Sic Willie) has a serious obsession with women in high-heeled shoes.  In fact his addiction eclipses even the legendary shoe fetish of Dom “Woogie” Woganowski from 1998’s Farrelly brothers’ comedy There’s Something About Mary.

Wait … it’s been fourteen friggin’ years since There’s Something About Mary came out?  Damn we’re getting old …

Anyway, we’ve never understood this shoe obsession – except to say it’s painfully obvious women in high heels make FITS founding editor Will Folks (a.k.a. Sic Willie) very, very happy.  Overjoyed even.  In fact there are some very nasty and totally true rumors out there insinuating certain well-placed images of high-heeled shoes have dictated this website’s coverage.  Of course these completely founded allegations have always struck us as totally irreproachable …

Ah, the joys of being “Unfair, Imbalanced.”

Examining this shoe fetish from a scientific standpoint is a new study from a research team at the University of Portsmouth (yes, they get government funding) – a study which concludes high heels “may exaggerate the sex-specific aspects” of a woman’s gait.

Wait … gait?

For those of you educated in a South Carolina government-run school, gait is the pattern of human limb movement during locomotion over a solid substrate.  Or “walking.”   Sorry … we didn’t mean to blind everybody with science just then.

So … what did these researchers uncover?

“We investigated the hypothesis that one motivation for women wearing high heels is that it artificially increases the femininity of gait,” the Portsmouth researchers reported. “We isolated the effects of heels on gait using point-light methodology. Females were recorded walking in flat shoes and high heels. Participants viewed point-light videos of the women wearing the two types of shoe. Participants judged the females in the heels condition as significantly more attractive (with a large effect size) than the females in the flat shoe condition.”

Large effect size? Why thank you.

“Biomechanical analyses revealed that wearing high heels led to increased femininity of gait including reduced stride length and increased rotation and tilt of the hips,” the researchers continued.

Mmmmmmm …

“We conclude that high heels exaggerate sex specific aspects of female gait and women walking in high heels could be regarded as a supernormal stimulus.”

There you have it, people.  Women wear high-heeled shoes for the resulting “sexywalk.”  And let’s be honest … God bless them for that.  We wouldn’t want to live in a world full of ballet flats and Jack Rogers.

UPDATE: Here are a few pics of the lovely Mrs. Sic Willie’s latest high-heeled shoes … and yes, we’re still amazed he scored like this too.  Miracles never cease do they?

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38 comments

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Judy Chop January 2, 2013 at 9:52 pm

Some guys send flowers to make up to their wife and some guys take pics of their wife and post them for all the world to see for brownie points. But only a few guys refer to themselves in the third person and tell the world how lucky they are.

“But honey you know how much I care for you — just go online and see for yourself.” “Please, pretty please let me keep posting pics of hot chicks.” “It makes me harder than Chinese Arithmetic.” “It’s a win win situation for both us — Honeeee….”

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shifty henry January 2, 2013 at 11:04 pm

These new photos must be Fits’ new year’s resolutions. Thanks, again.

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Cicero January 3, 2013 at 12:13 am

God made women beautiful. He also gave us this amazing gift of sexualizing beauty for some ultimate purpose of making the bond between husbands and wives stronger for not only weathering the storms of life for some procreative design, but simply to give couples in holy matrimony a true joy of being.

Will Folks posts perverted, clinically-verifiably demented bits abouts shoes and then pictures of *his wife’s legs* on his website. Only an indecent soul could wish he has a daughter.

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Judy Chop January 3, 2013 at 7:51 am

You should hear the whispers behind their back at their children’s school. Truly deviants in love. However, when you usher on Sunday it is all forgiven. Amazing what a little flower on the lapel does for ones soul.

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BigT January 3, 2013 at 8:42 am

After 8 years of Sanford telling us how pious he is..and FITS was his Ace-Boon-Spoon….

Any wonder?

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SparkleCity January 3, 2013 at 10:00 am

I kinda/gotta admit posting pictures of your wife’s attributes is kinda/sorta fucked up.

I mean we ain’t talking John & Bo Derrick’s Playboy spread here (which I thought was kinda/sorta fucked up too) but it’s in the same ballpark………

It’s kinda like saying look at what I’ve scored!!!!!

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Cicero January 3, 2013 at 12:17 am

And by the way, you fucking moron, pick up a book on puncuation. It’s called a “comma.” As in, “Miracles never cease [COMMA] do they?”

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pluffmudder January 3, 2013 at 1:13 am

If you wanted to make this a real news story, you would have researched how many tax dollars were wasted on this study telling us what we (some of us) already knew. This topic has been researched already (http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/homo-consumericus/200902/why-are-high-heels-so-enticing).

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BigT January 3, 2013 at 8:17 am

FITS Bashes SC Schools…then presents himself as the poster boy to represent their failure….

Dumb@$$….

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Thebeachisback January 3, 2013 at 9:12 am

Did you read the article, you imbecil???????? You were absent the day they taught humor, huh?

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toyota kawaski January 3, 2013 at 8:48 am

shemale in heels

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Charlie Chan January 3, 2013 at 9:01 am

Please, so sorry for grammar and punctuation mistakes. I try very, very hard for correctness. Have jobs at State paper, WLTX but not work out. Too many people complain about mistakes. Fitsnews give me new job. Please, I try very hard, but dear readers, please anoint my humble head when mistakes are seen in articles. I strive to be best proofreader in Columbia. Many humble children to feed. So sorry again.

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The Dude January 3, 2013 at 8:57 am

Damn I hate tramp stamps, guess it shows my age man.

Cover shot cool, bedroom shot looks like a tranny that walks Two Notch.

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little enos burdette January 3, 2013 at 9:02 am

Don’t keep it to yourself. Where on Two Notch?

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junior justice January 3, 2013 at 9:16 am

January 1st is NATIONAL FOOT DAY.

Fits was right on it.

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jimlewis,owb January 3, 2013 at 9:58 am

After reading some of the comments found it necessary to scroll back to the home page to make sure I was on the right fucking site.

So, willie is writing/talking in the third person. So, willie is butt nakkied on the bedroom floor taking up skirt photos of his wife. So, willie publishes a couple of up skirt photos of his wife.

And all of this means what; Nothing really; Expected behavior.

After all this is the same perverted little mother fucker who took a sitting Legislator out to the parking lot and had his knob polished to the point he had to have it re-chromed.

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shifty henry January 3, 2013 at 10:12 am

Who said she was “sitting” – we have to wait for his book.

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? January 3, 2013 at 10:19 am

Once again, OWB puts everything in its proper perspective. Good job Jim.

I don’t get the “shemale” stuff either, I think she’s pretty good looking myself. I’m not sure that stuff isn’t an attempt to simply strike out over some past wrong committed via Will against the commenter.

I don’t think there would be too many guys that wouldn’t find Mrs. Sic attractive.

I know I would never post pics on the internets of my hot wife with some suggestive commentary…but hey, that’s what makes us all different. All the whiners can just go to another site.

If they really are trying to get into a swingers club or whatever,then that’s their deal I guess-and it fits with stuff like this. But let’s be real, right now it’s him bragging on his wife and showing her legs in a pair of heels.

It’s not like he just posted pics of himself mounting her on the kitchen table with her skirt hiked up and head bent back in ecstasy while he goes to pound town.

This commentary is the kind of crap you see with the “Tipper Gore” types…unfortunately many times it’s not enough that they just voice their opinion, they gotta try to ram their opinions down everything else’s throat via govco/laws/etc. instead of simply “turning the channel” or going someplace else.

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Judy Chop January 3, 2013 at 6:29 pm

@? Type In “SC Voter Porn” in FitsNews’ search block. Its about 5 pages back in the Random Stuff section. The chick with no panties and the cat-o-nine tails covering her waxed V-jay is Mrs Sic. Sic’s wife has no problem with Sic’s hornier than thou behavior.

No big deal, to each his own. Just kinda weird that you do this and post pics of your children next to ’em.

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? January 4, 2013 at 12:58 am

Well, assuming you are correct- I would say the fact they didn’t put her face in the pic means they were might have been doing it as an inside gag and obviously wanted some level of privacy-so it’s not quite like you are suggesting as far as posting “porn” next to pictures of their kids as it was never meant to be open in the first place and I’ve a sneaking suspicion they don’t let their kids read FITSnews.

Because I like questions as sometimes they bring me answers, the next two that pop into my head would be:

1. Did Mrs. Sic know her hubby was going to post that pic of her with the cat-o-nine?

2. How on earth did you find out? Obviously you are connected in some way on a very personal level. Do you feel like you are betraying them at all personally given the level of trust one or both of them placed in you by sharing that information with you?

In the big scheme of things it all probably doesn’t matter much as OWB pointed out. I’m here to witness the daily train wreck called gov’t and experiencing schadenfreude in the process(as it relates to those deserving in my estimation, which happens to be most of what Will is reporting on…pols…although the bureacrats/technocrats are fun to bash as well). Will and his wife’s sexual proclivities don’t mean anything to me.

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SparkleCity January 3, 2013 at 10:03 am

I guess what we next is pictures of “My Dog is prettier than your dog”.

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shifty henry January 3, 2013 at 10:32 am

A woman with eight children happened to run across a childhood friend. “Myrna,” she asked, “how come you got no kids?” she asked.

“I practice preventive measures,” was the answer.

“Preventive measures? What’s that?” asked Evelyn.

“I use two saucers and a box. My husband’s a lot taller than I am and we like to screw standing up. When he gets a hard on I pull up my dress, spread my legs, and put the two saucers on the table. He stands up on the box so he can get all the way inside me and starts jumping up and down.”

“So where does all this get you?’ asked Evelyn, confused.

“That’s when I got to watch him very closely. When his eyes get as big as those two saucers, I kick the box out from under him.”

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? January 3, 2013 at 10:35 am

lulz…good one.

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sid January 3, 2013 at 11:02 am

Shouldn’t the husband be a lot shorter if he needs a box?

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Manray9 January 3, 2013 at 10:53 am

I can’t believe there is a Mrs. Sic Willie!

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say what?!? January 3, 2013 at 11:57 am

the third person stuff makes you creepy

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ceilidh10 January 3, 2013 at 12:38 pm

When his wife is out of town, Sic Willie probably parades around his mansion in stilettos, if not tight panties and short dresses. His fetish betrays a secret desire to have a woman dominate him and grind him down, crushing his “masculinity.”

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shifty henry January 3, 2013 at 4:10 pm

…… so, that was the attraction for Nikki, and I’ll bet Mikie feels the same way. HAH!

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9" January 3, 2013 at 8:34 pm

Just wondering.Since Fits bunked a bit with Sanford,what were his farts like?

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jackwitharch January 4, 2013 at 7:59 am

in regards to Mrs. Sic Willie’s latest heels, love the toecleavage of the left foot.

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Raspy January 4, 2013 at 1:11 pm

Show us more shots of the bottoms of their feet.

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William H. "Buz" Martin, a.k.a. @BozMartin January 4, 2013 at 2:12 pm

The third person thing is merely a quaint, somewhat archaic literary/journalistic convention. Another example would be O’Reilly’s use 3rd Person references to “Talking Points”, which is a segment of his show composed of nothing more than his usual blather, thematically set apart from the rest of it.

Women in high heels are hot. Mrs. Sic has absolutely killer legs, made even hotter by the high heels. These posts by Sic are fun, sexy stuff. The world, the nation and the state are going to hell, obviously. Why not look at enjoyable pics, why not let this crazy dude Sic brag a little?

If you don’t like it, don’t look.

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shifty henry January 5, 2013 at 7:16 am

“Women…….little”

Buz, welcome to the club – you are a true connoisseur of the feminine attributes!

Fits, you may post as many photos of your good woman as you like (and she permits).

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Judy Chop January 5, 2013 at 8:45 am

Hey Boz. Thanks for your off the cuff comment regarding Sic’s “quaint” convention of referring to his self in the third person. You are correct in that it is sometimes used in literature as a stylistic device.

However, any psychiatrist worth his salt will tell you that people who frequently refer to themselves in the third person suffer from a personality disorder. It is called “Illeism.” (from the Latin ille meaning, “he”) Folks like Sic use it with an air of grandeur to puff themselves up or to illustrate their egoism.

Perhaps Sic is a wrestling fan and took a cue from The Rock who was notorious for this — mainly to enhance his persona. Cam Newton, NFL quarterback suffers as well.

You think Sic pats himself on the back? Check his right arm. Its a foot longer than his left from frequent reaching.

Also, in science fiction robots and computers and other artificial life refer to themselves in the third person. “This unit is malfunctioning”. But perhaps your literary definition is more accurate — like the the way it was used in the movie, Blazing Saddles to show idiocy. “Mongo like Candy” “Sic likes poon-tang propped up with heels”

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junior justice January 5, 2013 at 11:57 pm

Judy – you’re a trip!

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Judy Chop January 6, 2013 at 10:37 am

Thanks JJ. Always enjoy reading your posts as well.

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Shitfor Brains January 6, 2013 at 12:18 am

Why do porn stars keep their high heels on?

Would you walk around in that shit?

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jimlewis,owb January 7, 2013 at 9:49 am

To keep their feet from sticking to the floor.

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